Living Under the Shadow of Stalking
"Stalking consumes your life completely. You can't breathe, you can't move because that person, whether they're physically there or not, they're in your head all of the time," says a victim of abuse.
Claire, a pseudonym to protect her identity, endured a prolonged campaign of abuse by her former partner. His actions included unwanted visits to her home, monitoring her social media activity, and physically assaulting her by punching the side of her head.
Following these events, he was convicted of assault by beating, stalking, and harassment. In recognition of this year's Stalking Awareness Week, Claire has chosen to share her experience publicly.
"You can't live a normal life, because you're second guessing everything. You don't know what reality is anymore."
Restraining Order and Escalation of Abuse
Claire, who resides in the Medway Towns, currently has a restraining order against her former partner. The abusive behaviour escalated in 2018 after she expressed her desire to end the relationship.
Her former partner frequently appeared outside her residence, inundated her with phone calls, and persistently stalked her social media accounts.
Additionally, he made allegations to social services accusing Claire of neglecting her child, further intensifying the distress she experienced.
Claire revealed that she had not slept properly for over a year due to the ongoing harassment.
She also disclosed that her former partner hacked into her WiFi network, monitored her emails, and used a baby camera to observe her movements.
"You can't even communicate with people about what's going on. Your world becomes so small."
Fear and Police Response
Claire described how the situation led her to fear for her life, with the threat of her former partner carrying out his repeated threats to end her life feeling very real.
Initially, the police treated the behaviour as harassment. However, subsequent legal proceedings resulted in convictions that accurately reflected the severity of his actions.
Since his release on licence, there has been no contact, but Claire remains vigilant.
"I think that I can never fully let my guard down, because he will never let it go," she said.
Advocacy and Need for Greater Awareness
Sue Dunn from Protection Against Stalking, an organisation that began advocating for Claire in 2019, emphasized the importance of recognizing the seriousness of stalking offences.
"There needs to be a recognition. If a person reports stalking, there is already an escalation - people do not report it if they are not fearful."
Dunn also highlighted the persistent issue of insufficient specialist services for stalking victims, noting that the 89 services available nationwide are inadequate to meet demand.
Contact and Further Information
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